How to write characters of the opposite gender (Part 1)

Many of my readers often ask me how I wrote such a strong and complex female lead character, Lilith (antagonist) and also managed to write an equally strong and just as complex character as Felipe (protagonist and anti-hero) male character.
The answer is simple, it wasn’t easy. Before I go on, I would like to state the obvious, males and females are different. We think and talk differently. In most cases we rarely understand each other. Each writer will approach this differently, but I will share my process.

First and foremost, I didn’t want to impose my point of view of the opposite sex onto my characters. Instead, I approached it from the plot of the story and character development. Each main character has a particular motivation. I allowed my characters to grow from their motivations. Since the book series is horror, I got to play with the male/female psyche a little more than if the storyline was a literary drama.

When I wrote Felipe’s character, I tried not to substitute gender for personality. “Men ought to do/say this or that.” I didn’t want Felipe to come across macho, that cliché was actually reserved for Tomás de Hayos, Felipe’s father’s character—a controlling man, consumed by greed. I purposely intended for Tomas de Hayos’s character to fit the stereotypical macho Latin father of the fifteenth century.  
Since Felipe had to undergo the biggest character arcs, I first presented him to the reader as a kind, charismatic, insightful young man that obeyed his father, but also had dreams, and goals of his own. I strived for a three-dimensional character. Later, when Felipe is cursed into the vampire, he becomes a ruthless, coldblooded killer with supernatural powers. He's the perfect anti-hero!

I gave Felipe plenty of character flaws, inner conflict, which included: morality/religious/spiritual. I drew upon several strong males in my personal life to breathe life into this character. My goal was to make Felipe as realistic as possible. I tried to answer the question: How would a male react to these supernatural events, happening in his life? I mean there’s no way to know for sure since turning someone into a vampire isn’t possible—at least I hope not. But I think I answered the question and fans of Felipe responded with empathy for the character.

Some helpful tips:

1. Draw from the cultural background of your characters. Every culture has imposed expectations on gender behavior. As a writer, you can bend the rules of these expectations. For me, my series takes place in fifteenth century Spain. I did lots of research on the manner of dress and social conduct of the people of Spain during that time period. I took this information, applied and changed it to fit my characters and their motivations.
2. Take time to develop your characters.
3. Give your characters strong motivations.
4. Base your characters on someone you know. Draw from a strong or interesting person of the opposite sex that you know. How would that person (brother, father, husband… act/react to sensitive situations? How would your mother, sister, wife…react to intense situations?
5. Give your characters flaws to ensure they are three-dimensional and not falling flat.
6. Develop character arcs.
7. Give your character a backstory.
8. Give your characters conflicting personality traits. Remember, men and women can be both ruthless and sensitive.
9. Use character templates, which can be useful for building character personality traits and getting into the minds of your characters. You can create one of your own or go online to find a character template. Here’s my favorite from Reedsy.com https://reedsy.com/studio/templates/category/characters
10. Don’t stress if your characters fall within gender expectations as long as you’re doing it intentionally.

Remember: The plot and your character’s motivations should drive gender roles—aiding in character development and is the surest way of crafting realistic personalities. If your characters have strong motivations, writing a strong character of the opposite sex should be a snap.

Next Month: Tips for male writers: How to Write a Strong Female Character
Peace
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